soooo many emotions. i'm currently sitting at my computer bawling. this isn't what was supposed to happen. sending off mattie was supposed to be a big hallelujah!! why are goodbyes so hard! both my sisters/ bestfriends/ sidekicks are out in the big world leaving me behind. memories are rushing in my head back like it was yesterday when we were all together driving to St. George listening to all our favorite jams and watching cheesy movies together, or going to lunch and so many other funny memories. I wish so bad i could go back and cherish those moments. I miss my best friends. it hit me this is happening, and i wont see mattie for 18 months! i thought letting her go would be easy but noooo not one little bit. there is no one downstairs to turn off the lights when i forget, or listen to music and have countless dance parties in the morning when we would all get ready together in the mornings. i miss it. all these emotions remind me of when we went to st geezy a while back for our annual girls trip and when we got home i went BAWLING to my mom because i didn't want the trip to end. I have a harrrddd time letting good memories end! haha but on a good note, our cute Hermana is 10 months done! wow time is flying... sort of! the same emotions are coming to me as when haley left and it's hard. after some good long cry's i agree that letting people go is part of life and it has to happen sometime sooner or later! they are leaving for the best purpose and there is no other place i would rather have them be!
sending all my love sister nelson! <3
side note... of course i turn on pandora and the first song that plays is beautiful goodbye by maroon 5, the same song that i listened to right after haley left. ahhhh #)(*&)#)%&!** ! and guess what song came on next??? gone, gone, gone by phillip phillips! WHAT IS LIFE? thanks pandora for making me cry even harder and longer!
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